HDoubleG
Typing up a ‘have a nice life, fuckface’ letter on Microsoft Word because I keep even my personal life professional.
This is me shooting a giant double middle finger to every fucking person* I encountered tonight.
Also, I apparently cut the eff out of my right thumb somehow and didn’t realize it, so my entire Blackberry is covered in blood. Appropriate.
*Okay, actually just one person.
This Is Important, You Should Watch It of the Day: To promote his effort to raise production funds for a documentary about anti-gay discrimination, filmmaker Ryan James Yezak released a seven-minute compilation of clips cataloging the conquered battlegrounds of the gay rights movement scattered amidst a war yet to be won.
“I am not a second class citizen,” Yezak says. “You are not a second class citizen. Right now, the laws in place (and lack thereof) say that we are. Let’s change that.”
[rjy.]
Golden Girls wisdom
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Rose:I know grief. It takes time.
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Dorothy:Please, Rose. Listen, if you're Irish, you have a wake. You eat, you cry, you drink, you vomit and you're done. If you're Jewish, you cry, you sit, you eat for seven days. You put on ten pounds, and it's over. We Italians scream, dress up a donkey, hire a band, and that's that. It's these Southern Protestants who make it a way of life.
I can’t stop laughing at my own Facebook status.
…but nobody else thinks it’s funny.
Inappropriate Wooing of the Day: The signature wooing noise made by the live audience (or laugh track) of cheesy sitcoms inserted into some pretty inappropriate scenes from Saved By The Bell.
[hyst.]
LOLed so hard. So very, very hard.
Hi I’m The-Womanifesto from Tumblr and I’m your Miss America.
I actually watched Miss America for the first time in my life last night because I was in a hotel room with my mother and she had the remote. The question and answer portion was as vapid as expected from all of them except Miss Arizona. Clearly, my Tumblr followers can answer these much better. So post in my ask and tell me how YOU would answer these questions if you were standing in front of a national audience in your bikini under the guise of an empowering scholarship opportunity.
The (paraphrased) Miss America 2012 questions:
1. Should a person representing an organization (aka Miss America) declare her political views?
2. Should the government step in because all of our kids are fat?
3. We have to talk about Tim Tebow some more. He’s mega-religious, but should he be pushing it so much since he’s a public figure?
4. What do you think of Occupy Wall Street?
5. Is “Teen Mom” giving kids the wrong message?My answers:
1. Miss America isn’t supposed to be married, right? So how can she have political views if she doesn’t have a husband to give them to her, duh! I guess she could go off of her father’s for now, but maybe it’s just best if she doesn’t have them at all.
2. Keep the government out of our business. If someone isn’t educated about eating healthy and doesn’t have access to healthy food for their kids, why did they have sex in the first place?
3. We’re a Christian nation and football is a Christian sport so all players should be like Tebow. Let’s talk about him and his religion for at least 6 more months.
4. Uuuhh hello, why don’t they just, like, go do something about it instead of whining all the time. Ever heard of a job application?
5. I think it’s 14-year-old girls’ responsibility to know that what they’re watching isn’t how they should be behaving. I mean, we of course shouldn’t be talking to them about sex and how to be safe because they’re too young for that stuff, but letting them watch a harmless tv show isn’t going to get them instantly pregnant!
This Pac-Man ukulele is custom made. Each is made out of maple with an ipa fretboard. Sold on Etsy.
ENDORPHINS!
This post brought to you by the grungy track above the basketball courts at the Donelson-Hermitage YMCA.
one of my facebook friends just made this her status
Eli watched her mouth, for Hannah was praying silently;
though her lips were moving, her voice could not be heard.
Eli, thinking her drunk, said to her,
“How long will you make a drunken show of yourself?
Sober up from your wine!”
“It isn’t that, my lord,” Hannah answered.
“I am an unhappy woman.
I have had neither wine nor liquor;
I was only pouring out my troubles to the LORD.
Do not think your handmaid a ne’er-do-well;
my prayer has been prompted by my deep sorrow and misery.”
You hear that, bitches?? I’m not drunk!! I just want a damn baby up in me for the Lord and shit!!!!!
Okay, I’m drunk.
(Source: goodonerobot)
My dad just called and was asking me questions about my future career, and when I said that I definitely didn’t want to stay in Nashville, he asked, “So would you move to L.A. or New York or something? Or like…San Francisco?”
Is this his terrible attempt at subtly finding out if I like girls?? Just ask, Dad. Jesus.
This is how a mathematician/engineer explains her breakup.
I love this person.
